We Have To Close Our Eyes

It's 3am and I've just been ordered to bed because my (usually) lovely wife needs me to run to the chemist tomorrow morning and get her the magic anti-chicken-pox pills.

So we're laying in bed in the dark and she says "you know what's annoying?! turn your #%^*ing t-shirt off!"

I've just taken delivery of a tshirt from threadless.com with a lightsaber on the front where the blade is an energy saver fluro lightbulb. Awesome, I know. The best bit is the bulb glows in the dark! Right? Yeah baby!

So anyway she complains that the shirt is bright and I say "you can NOT see that with your eyes closed!". To which she replies "I can't keep my eyes closed all the time!!!".

Now I want to point out once again, it's 3am and we're laying in bed in the dark...except for the shirt...so in the almost complete darkness.

And I realize why she can't sleep.
It's not the pox. She's doing it wrong.

"Baby, you have to close your eyes!"

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Crazy 101 - The Teacher Is In!

So we're watching an ad for Duracel's new contact charge pad and the following conversation ensued:

Mari: Cooool *excited*
Tony: Yeah
Mari: A cheaper alternative *very earnestly*
Tony: Ye..wait what?
Mari: A cheaper alt...
Tony: yeah yeah yeah I uh... Why is it cheaper?
Mari: ...it's duracel... or energizer... It's gotta be cheaper than... like... a website...
Tony: Wow! That's some crazy sh*t you said right there
Mari: *completely cracked up* It sounded right in my head...

For bonus points see if you can guess at what point the crazy lady got distracted by the next ad during the conversation.